I am a ball of frustration at the minute, everything is getting blown out of proportion, everyone is annoying me, and everything anyone says is getting a sharp retort or silence back. I either don’t know how to reply, or it just comes out as a narky response. I need to get away from people and sort myself out before I snap badly at someone!
The things that are annoying me-
I am trying everything I can do to help improve my health and nothing is working
I am restricting my life because of this illness and its effects on me and there is nothing I can do about it.
I’m embarrassed about using a walking stick, using disabled parking, not being able to wear the clothes I want to, I miss my heels and feel like a frump!
I can’t do the activities I want to do, from going bowling, a walk on the beach, to going shopping, taking my nephews out or seeing friends and family more often.
I am sick of family comments about disabled people getting discounts or things free.
I am sick of them laughing and commenting when I say I need rest days.
I hate that within 2 months my boyfriend has become my carer, we don’t get to have the courtship part of a relationship, just jump right into practically being married!
I hate how unpredictable this is. I can be fine one day and crippled the next, it doesn’t seem to matter at all what I do!
I hate that it’s getting worse, the last flare up I couldn’t undress myself or go to the toilet, it is so embarrassing and frustrating.
I hate that I’ve had to change jobs. I don’t know how I fit in at work and my job is made up, it’s very unsettling.
I hate that I don’t feel I get paid for what I do at work. The responsibilities and the way people treat me is not relative to how I am paid.